Tuesday, 1 December 2009

Circles

When I got all wound up in knots planning my future - drawing out all of the possible outcomes, determining probabilities, trying to figure out the "best" course to take - Marlene would always tell me that I'm worrying about nothing.  You have no decisions to make.  Worry when you have a decision to make.

Mostly, she'd say this to shut me up.  But there was still a lot of wisdom in the words.  After all, she was right.  I didn't have any real decisions to make.  Choosing between programs or courses.  Choosing between this entry level job or that one.  It didn't matter.  None of it mattered.  You're looking way too far in advance.  Just do it, then worry.  Even when you are forced to choose between two paths, that's a good thing.  That's where you want to be.

I took her advice.  I took time off school and worked.  I took different jobs.  I tested many different waters.  I stopped thinking and finally trusted that I'd grow and learn in any situation.  That's what it was all about to me, anyway - growing and learning, not wasting time.  I had nothing to lose and everything to gain.

I've been saying this a lot lately.  I have nothing to lose and everything to gain. I must have no decisions to make.  Off to change that!
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