Monday, 24 September 2012

It occurred to me

...the other night, as I exited the Department at 8pm alone after a late meeting at the office, and I walked up St. George Street while the campus streets were abuzz with the activities of a new school year, that I'm a student before I'm an employee. It occurred to me that I'm a member before I'm an organizer. I'm a participant.  I can age, and grow, and change, but I when I step foot on campus, I can feel as alive as I did that first day that I ever did as long as I participate in the activities here.

But in this grand epiphany, I had to concede that something yet was amiss.  That in spite of this renewed excitement to be here, something was different.

When I started University, it felt like a sacrifice of billable hours.  Back then, it was an inconvenience.  Today, it had further occurred to me, that it's a pleasure.  Education is no longer obligatory.  It is no longer a means to an end.  It is the end.  I preached this for seven years, but only now do I fully believe it.  I faked it, and now, I made it.

I'm more free now than when I was eighteen, in spite of my constraints.  Dare I say it?  I dare!  I am better off now than I was 11 years ago.  I knew this, but I feel it.  I could see it. I no longer feel like I am trying to swim with cinder blocks.
There was an error in this gadget